*Thanks Yao*
Have you ever been in a deep problem, stuck in layers upon layers of emotional distress and seemingly insurmountable problems, just to have another friend presents you with a simple solution... so simple that makes you think "Why the heck didn't I think of this all these time?"
I have held a little grudge towards a good 'brother' of mine from high school. We've been through much together, doing a lot of stuff together like gaming and playing badminton. He was always the nicest guy and subsequently my best friend. The grudge was the fruit of my jealousy when he found a girlfriend. We started to spend less time together and he's always away with his gf. At first I was not too used to it, perhaps I was hurt and translated all of that into pure emotional anger.
Then a friend of mine shed light of wisdom onto my problem and the anger dispersed to hide in shame.
"You wouldn't put your friends first when you have a wife."
That's a smack of pure awesome reality in my face. I knew I wasn't going to be priority of other people all the time.
I cannot say for sure now that one day if I really have a girlfriend, that I would put my friends first above my girlfriend. That doesn't make me a really good boyfriend does it?
Haha. How silly of me.
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
The Doctor of Me
I am a 1st year medical student of the year 2012. I am back here in Kuantan, Malaysia for holiday break and will return to Xi'an, China to resume my medical studies a couple of weeks from now. Since I've enrolled into medical school, I've felt there is an added weight on my shoulders.
I was playing badminton with a few of my friends this morning and this time out of all the other times I have been playing badminton for the last few years, I approached this sport with a different attitude. I wanted to be serious. The goal for me is not to win, but to not make mistakes. It kills me every time when the ball hits the rims of my racket and the shuttle flies far out from the court, or when my smash hits the shuttle a little too early or a little too late and the shuttle gets trapped on the net. I know it sounds stupid for me to say this: I feel horribly ashamed when I made a mistake. Although my friends seems to get used to me making silly mistakes in the game, but after each and every mistake I made I screamed in my heart that "I would never make that stupid mistake again! ARGH!" - and it doesn't work. It never works.
I may get better and better as my body warms up and I become more aware and careful when I meet the same situations when the shuttle is coming fast to my left because I have a weak backhand stroke, or when the shuttle is going near the net because I'm especially weak at the net. I knew I had to be more careful. And I tried, but mistakes - as I should have known - is ubiquitous and inevitable.
I already know that as a human, you are bound to make mistakes. Even in a simple, irrelevant game in badminton, I care a lot when my team fails because of my mistake. As a doctor, a mistake could cost a life. I am afraid the day I make that mistake. I'm even more afraid because I know myself. I know late at night, I grow blurry and don't make good decisions. Even when sometimes I know I am in my top form, I still may become reckless, or forgetful and starts to mess everything up. Being a doctor, there is a culture that we cannot make mistakes and that for me is really scary.
After today's game I had a long time to think. All the more thinking I did, the more depressed I became. More and more questions I ask myself starting with "what if...", and each time I bring up a scenario where a patient, directly or indirectly dies because of my mistake - I did not know how I could ever react to that. I did not know how I could ever face the patient's family. I feel alone and sad and there's no one I could talk to. It's not even something you should talk about or could really proudly admit when you've made a mistake and someone died from it.
I must strive to be perfect.
I was playing badminton with a few of my friends this morning and this time out of all the other times I have been playing badminton for the last few years, I approached this sport with a different attitude. I wanted to be serious. The goal for me is not to win, but to not make mistakes. It kills me every time when the ball hits the rims of my racket and the shuttle flies far out from the court, or when my smash hits the shuttle a little too early or a little too late and the shuttle gets trapped on the net. I know it sounds stupid for me to say this: I feel horribly ashamed when I made a mistake. Although my friends seems to get used to me making silly mistakes in the game, but after each and every mistake I made I screamed in my heart that "I would never make that stupid mistake again! ARGH!" - and it doesn't work. It never works.
I may get better and better as my body warms up and I become more aware and careful when I meet the same situations when the shuttle is coming fast to my left because I have a weak backhand stroke, or when the shuttle is going near the net because I'm especially weak at the net. I knew I had to be more careful. And I tried, but mistakes - as I should have known - is ubiquitous and inevitable.
I already know that as a human, you are bound to make mistakes. Even in a simple, irrelevant game in badminton, I care a lot when my team fails because of my mistake. As a doctor, a mistake could cost a life. I am afraid the day I make that mistake. I'm even more afraid because I know myself. I know late at night, I grow blurry and don't make good decisions. Even when sometimes I know I am in my top form, I still may become reckless, or forgetful and starts to mess everything up. Being a doctor, there is a culture that we cannot make mistakes and that for me is really scary.
After today's game I had a long time to think. All the more thinking I did, the more depressed I became. More and more questions I ask myself starting with "what if...", and each time I bring up a scenario where a patient, directly or indirectly dies because of my mistake - I did not know how I could ever react to that. I did not know how I could ever face the patient's family. I feel alone and sad and there's no one I could talk to. It's not even something you should talk about or could really proudly admit when you've made a mistake and someone died from it.
I must strive to be perfect.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
look through my eyes
A few days ago, I had lunch with all the other Chinese in my dorm. My friends think it's nicer and cheaper. But food to me is around the same price everywhere else. I don't mind what kind of food i eat, as long as there's rice. Haha.. damn i love rice. =)
These 2 people are just absolutely nice. They are married couple now studying in my school. Both of them are 2 years my senior. Keenoo and Nuree is what we all call them, so i don't know their full names. Hah.
I just wanted to post a few random pictures once in a while. This is the only way i know how to share with people what I see. I'm not a great talker, and definitely i don't have a good memory. By the time i get home, i'd probably forgot everything I wanted to say. I'm not predicting this to happen, i KNOW it will happen.
It's Sunday morning so now i'm going to Church now. Byee..
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
first autumn
This is the picture I took a few days back of the same place. All the leaves have shed! The trees are bare and seemed so dead. This season really makes one feel rather moody.
All over the city, it would look a bit like this. Fallen leaves all over the ground. I felt like God is trying to tell me something by showing this to me for the first time.
Still, it's a beautiful scene to look at.
Eventually it will be snowing and i'll take more pictures of it for you guys.
Haha... KDG Clothing Brand (note: no glasses, so he's a different guy)
I don't have time to write too much in this post. I've been quite busy. Will write more next time.
Love ya'll
Monday, November 14, 2011
你好！
Honestly, being in China for my 4th week now, my Mandarin language skills have not improved one kilobyte. So i'm not going to write this post in Chinese.
To all my friends back at home, how have you all been...? It has been ages. Haha, living so far apart from you all... i'm running low on questions to ask of you. So that's probably the only one I could ask about. Yet, from the bottom of my heart I wish you all well and pray that whatever you desire for will come true in the near future. Facebook is being very mean to me because it gives me a feeling of being "so close, yet so far....so soo far."
Walking the dark walk of life, alone - is okay.
On Halloween's Day, we went out to a bar. This area is within the city walls, so almost all the designs of the buildings and pavements were made to resemble ancient China.
After 4 weeks, I've finally found a good proxy that allows me to access blocked websites, but at a slow rate. Facebook is pain in the ass.
I haven't took much pictures to show you all. Sometimes i just find it boring to take pictures of inanimate things like scenery and buildings. Haha, so I don't take them at all. Don't worry though, I will definitely take pictures on special occasions. There's still Christmas to come! WITH SNOW!
Guys, how are you all?
They say when you look at the moon, you'll think of home. I find that quite true sometimes. There's a partial full moon hanging in the skies, but not accompanied by the twinkling of stars, but instead blips of airplanes. Xi'an is a modern city, and it is growing really rapidly. There is construction sites like almost everywhere. Everything is changing so much, so fast here.
However, people don't change that fast. I haven't changed. Perhaps I've grown a bit after leaving that sanctuary of mine in Kuantan. Life is brutally cold here, physically and emotionally. The story of 小悦悦 really shook China that I could even feel it in Xi'an. People of China really need to stop and look deep into their hearts, search in their consciousness, what is the value of another person's life? They'd think "As long as the victim is not me, i'm just thankful - there's no need for me to help." They'd never stopped to think:" What if that little girl that got run over by a truck on the road was my daughter? What if the person that got stabbed was my brother? What if the person getting raped in the backstreets is my wife?"
Nope. Chinese people are smart. They're practical people. The population of China is so big. If I just close one eye and just watch this pickpocket steal the wallet of another, there's a one in a billion chance that he would pick my pocket. Rather if I catch that pickpocket, he'll come out of jail in a few months and start stealing again, which is the same. The mindset of the people here are messed up. They've covered their conscience with layers of fear and greed, and their self-importance. Every day, there will be an incident of a person getting raped, killed, mugged - but could easily be prevented if someone would just dialed 110 or lifted a finger to help.
Is this the one billion effect? When you live in a highly populated region, you will value life much less. People die, but there will always be new faces. You will value others much less. If you were to help every stranger that is in trouble, you would probably have to do a lot. Only thing important is to take good care of yourself, feed your parents and grandparents AND your wife's parents and grandparents. It's the one-child-policy that's putting a heavy burden each person. A normal family probably adds up like this(+ in laws); 8 grandparents, 4 parents, 1 child - is completely dependent on the able and working couple. Including the couple, they 2 have to support the lives of 15 people. There's no extra time or money to spare for other people.
Haha.. i'm sure this is not what you wanted to read about when coming to my blog. Truly sorry. I've been preoccupied with lots of things. Friends, and life.... I will try put up more of the bits of my life up for you guys to see.
Kimbereley (Chinese girl behind cake) had her birthday on the 7th November, which on that day she was facing an exam. So she couldn't have had the time - or the right mind and mood - to celebrate her birthday. So we celebrated her belated birthday last Sunday. There was an awesome cake, and them. =)
They're the closest thing I have to family here.
Also this is the month of Autumn.
The left building is my campus library. It's like the only place I've seen so far with brown leaves covering the trees that line the sides of the pathways.
Autumn is pretty cold for me, and I'm not really looking forward to the winter. Hah!
I'll try to put a picture for every post next time.
Cheers people. Remember don't don't remember me. =)
To all my friends back at home, how have you all been...? It has been ages. Haha, living so far apart from you all... i'm running low on questions to ask of you. So that's probably the only one I could ask about. Yet, from the bottom of my heart I wish you all well and pray that whatever you desire for will come true in the near future. Facebook is being very mean to me because it gives me a feeling of being "so close, yet so far....so soo far."
Walking the dark walk of life, alone - is okay.
On Halloween's Day, we went out to a bar. This area is within the city walls, so almost all the designs of the buildings and pavements were made to resemble ancient China.
After 4 weeks, I've finally found a good proxy that allows me to access blocked websites, but at a slow rate. Facebook is pain in the ass.
I haven't took much pictures to show you all. Sometimes i just find it boring to take pictures of inanimate things like scenery and buildings. Haha, so I don't take them at all. Don't worry though, I will definitely take pictures on special occasions. There's still Christmas to come! WITH SNOW!
Guys, how are you all?
They say when you look at the moon, you'll think of home. I find that quite true sometimes. There's a partial full moon hanging in the skies, but not accompanied by the twinkling of stars, but instead blips of airplanes. Xi'an is a modern city, and it is growing really rapidly. There is construction sites like almost everywhere. Everything is changing so much, so fast here.
However, people don't change that fast. I haven't changed. Perhaps I've grown a bit after leaving that sanctuary of mine in Kuantan. Life is brutally cold here, physically and emotionally. The story of 小悦悦 really shook China that I could even feel it in Xi'an. People of China really need to stop and look deep into their hearts, search in their consciousness, what is the value of another person's life? They'd think "As long as the victim is not me, i'm just thankful - there's no need for me to help." They'd never stopped to think:" What if that little girl that got run over by a truck on the road was my daughter? What if the person that got stabbed was my brother? What if the person getting raped in the backstreets is my wife?"
Nope. Chinese people are smart. They're practical people. The population of China is so big. If I just close one eye and just watch this pickpocket steal the wallet of another, there's a one in a billion chance that he would pick my pocket. Rather if I catch that pickpocket, he'll come out of jail in a few months and start stealing again, which is the same. The mindset of the people here are messed up. They've covered their conscience with layers of fear and greed, and their self-importance. Every day, there will be an incident of a person getting raped, killed, mugged - but could easily be prevented if someone would just dialed 110 or lifted a finger to help.
Is this the one billion effect? When you live in a highly populated region, you will value life much less. People die, but there will always be new faces. You will value others much less. If you were to help every stranger that is in trouble, you would probably have to do a lot. Only thing important is to take good care of yourself, feed your parents and grandparents AND your wife's parents and grandparents. It's the one-child-policy that's putting a heavy burden each person. A normal family probably adds up like this(+ in laws); 8 grandparents, 4 parents, 1 child - is completely dependent on the able and working couple. Including the couple, they 2 have to support the lives of 15 people. There's no extra time or money to spare for other people.
Haha.. i'm sure this is not what you wanted to read about when coming to my blog. Truly sorry. I've been preoccupied with lots of things. Friends, and life.... I will try put up more of the bits of my life up for you guys to see.
Kimbereley (Chinese girl behind cake) had her birthday on the 7th November, which on that day she was facing an exam. So she couldn't have had the time - or the right mind and mood - to celebrate her birthday. So we celebrated her belated birthday last Sunday. There was an awesome cake, and them. =)
They're the closest thing I have to family here.
Also this is the month of Autumn.
Autumn is pretty cold for me, and I'm not really looking forward to the winter. Hah!
I'll try to put a picture for every post next time.
Cheers people. Remember don't don't remember me. =)
Sunday, October 9, 2011
before i take the biggest leap of my life... i just need to say
6:36AM. I'm writing this for you all.
Every time I go on Facebook now, I see you all, and all the time we had together. It's all gone now. It has all passed. At the same time right now, I feel I am both the happiest person - and the saddest person. Happy - because I have friends like you all. Sad - because we won't be friends like we used to anymore. We will be far apart, and we must have our own friends. We must all move on. It's what humans all must face.
There are changes in life that we cannot run away. The changes i'm going to have, will change everything. The changes you all made in my life, has become part of me. All that I am, is a big blend of ALL of you. I got the geeky-ness from KS and Kenny. I got the stubbornness from Yan. I got the gay-ness from Ryan. I got the madness from Russell. I got the politeness from CPY. A bit of craziness from NKL. Of course the kindness from Kenneth. A bit of street-smartness and steadiness from Teh, Yao and Wen. A bit of pevert-ness from, almost all the guys =.=". Add it all up, of course - you gave me a lot of happiness. The last 5 years of my life, I think I have no regrets. It was the best 5 years, maybe, of my entire life. I'm not sure if I can find people like you anymore in my life. I know China population very big, chances are high - but somethings are just irreplaceable.
Ever since January, I have been waiting for this day. I wasted all my time away at home playing - sleeping - eating. I know if I will start to think. Start to think a lot. What if..? I have successfully put my brain on 'sleep' mode until now. Today it's back on, and suddenly all these tears come from nowhere. Ugh. What a mess.
I ask myself this question every time I think about you all.
"How much do they love me back? Maybe something I did made them hate me? Maybe it's because I did this.. or I did that.. that he wouldn't want to see me again.." But I'm not that stupid. I had always known the answer. I cannot change you.
When I say :"I love you." As much as I want to hear you say it back to me, I understand if you wouldn't. I love, but I won't expect to be loved back. Less expectations - less disappointments. I will keep loving you. The 'you' I know now la.. If 10 years later any you turn into some freaking pervert rapist, I'm going to find you, and beat the sense back into you. If it doesn't go in, i'm going to treat you with my doctor skills. When you're all healed up, I'M GONNA FRIGGIN BEAT YOU UP AGAIN.
You're probably sitting there, reading this shit thinking "aiyoh, think too much le la." Problem is, you can't friggin change me either. I'm like that, will always be. Since you know that I "think a lot" - rest assured, i'll think of you guys, a lot too.
Sorry ah Teh, actually I had many chances to come KL and find you. But I didn't because - I really want to smell Kuantan air a bit longer.
People ask me what the meaning of life is, even though there's a cross hanging down my neck right now, I really don't know how to answer it. For me, life has no meaning. You just have fun with it. Have fun with it while you can. 100 years from now, you are just another face on a stone, waiting to be bulldozed (by Teh and Co.) and paved into a broad highway. Cars will just speed over your stupid bones and no one will remember your name.
I don't know after I die, what I can bring with me. Of course I don't need money. But I hope I can bring my memory. So maybe we can meet in Heaven's Eternal Starbucks, I'm sure we're going to have free refills up there. And we can look down on our little kids, heck, it might be quite boring up there - but at least I know I lived a good life. I can look at all the celebrities or kings or queens and lift my head high, because I have lived the life of Kings. I was happier, much happier that what money could ever give me. With money, i'll probably make my brain go 'sleep' mode. Buy lots of gaming gear, motorcycles, cars, houses - life would be thrilling and empty.
Heck, I feel empty all the time. Glad i'm the only one with this disease. This is not a good way to suffer. It's you who fills me up. That hole in my heart, it's all filled in.
7:18AM. I should move out at 9:20AM.
I don't know what will happen if i leave. I can feel the hole there already.
The sun is up already. So beautiful. Only now I'm noticing.. Has it been so beautiful? Has the air in Kuantan been so cool and refreshing? Is this place, all this while, so wonderful?
24 hours from now, i'll be breathing a different type of air already. please please please let there be Malaysian food there! ><"
I think BS has a surprise for me or something...
Ah! Okay. Steady. Time to "pack up my feelings" now. Hah. My sleeves are dried up dy. These words are really hard to write. This post will end here. The next would be written from China now.
With love,
Jerome
P.s. I love you.
Every time I go on Facebook now, I see you all, and all the time we had together. It's all gone now. It has all passed. At the same time right now, I feel I am both the happiest person - and the saddest person. Happy - because I have friends like you all. Sad - because we won't be friends like we used to anymore. We will be far apart, and we must have our own friends. We must all move on. It's what humans all must face.
There are changes in life that we cannot run away. The changes i'm going to have, will change everything. The changes you all made in my life, has become part of me. All that I am, is a big blend of ALL of you. I got the geeky-ness from KS and Kenny. I got the stubbornness from Yan. I got the gay-ness from Ryan. I got the madness from Russell. I got the politeness from CPY. A bit of craziness from NKL. Of course the kindness from Kenneth. A bit of street-smartness and steadiness from Teh, Yao and Wen. A bit of pevert-ness from, almost all the guys =.=". Add it all up, of course - you gave me a lot of happiness. The last 5 years of my life, I think I have no regrets. It was the best 5 years, maybe, of my entire life. I'm not sure if I can find people like you anymore in my life. I know China population very big, chances are high - but somethings are just irreplaceable.
Ever since January, I have been waiting for this day. I wasted all my time away at home playing - sleeping - eating. I know if I will start to think. Start to think a lot. What if..? I have successfully put my brain on 'sleep' mode until now. Today it's back on, and suddenly all these tears come from nowhere. Ugh. What a mess.
I ask myself this question every time I think about you all.
"How much do they love me back? Maybe something I did made them hate me? Maybe it's because I did this.. or I did that.. that he wouldn't want to see me again.." But I'm not that stupid. I had always known the answer. I cannot change you.
When I say :"I love you." As much as I want to hear you say it back to me, I understand if you wouldn't. I love, but I won't expect to be loved back. Less expectations - less disappointments. I will keep loving you. The 'you' I know now la.. If 10 years later any you turn into some freaking pervert rapist, I'm going to find you, and beat the sense back into you. If it doesn't go in, i'm going to treat you with my doctor skills. When you're all healed up, I'M GONNA FRIGGIN BEAT YOU UP AGAIN.
You're probably sitting there, reading this shit thinking "aiyoh, think too much le la." Problem is, you can't friggin change me either. I'm like that, will always be. Since you know that I "think a lot" - rest assured, i'll think of you guys, a lot too.
Sorry ah Teh, actually I had many chances to come KL and find you. But I didn't because - I really want to smell Kuantan air a bit longer.
People ask me what the meaning of life is, even though there's a cross hanging down my neck right now, I really don't know how to answer it. For me, life has no meaning. You just have fun with it. Have fun with it while you can. 100 years from now, you are just another face on a stone, waiting to be bulldozed (by Teh and Co.) and paved into a broad highway. Cars will just speed over your stupid bones and no one will remember your name.
I don't know after I die, what I can bring with me. Of course I don't need money. But I hope I can bring my memory. So maybe we can meet in Heaven's Eternal Starbucks, I'm sure we're going to have free refills up there. And we can look down on our little kids, heck, it might be quite boring up there - but at least I know I lived a good life. I can look at all the celebrities or kings or queens and lift my head high, because I have lived the life of Kings. I was happier, much happier that what money could ever give me. With money, i'll probably make my brain go 'sleep' mode. Buy lots of gaming gear, motorcycles, cars, houses - life would be thrilling and empty.
Heck, I feel empty all the time. Glad i'm the only one with this disease. This is not a good way to suffer. It's you who fills me up. That hole in my heart, it's all filled in.
7:18AM. I should move out at 9:20AM.
I don't know what will happen if i leave. I can feel the hole there already.
The sun is up already. So beautiful. Only now I'm noticing.. Has it been so beautiful? Has the air in Kuantan been so cool and refreshing? Is this place, all this while, so wonderful?
24 hours from now, i'll be breathing a different type of air already. please please please let there be Malaysian food there! ><"
I think BS has a surprise for me or something...
Ah! Okay. Steady. Time to "pack up my feelings" now. Hah. My sleeves are dried up dy. These words are really hard to write. This post will end here. The next would be written from China now.
With love,
Jerome
P.s. I love you.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Thoughts and Emotions of a Departing
Oops. It's already October. You know, it's really hard to have a blog AND consistently update it. Blogger has got this new interface! Probably had it ages ago and i didn't know, but i know now that it rocks. =]
Anyways, this will be my last week in Malaysia, before I begin to pursue studies overseas. Perhaps i'll be able to keep this blog updated at least once a week. I don't really know what to expect. I don't know what i'll turn out to become. I'm afraid I might turn out to become some alcoholic, smoking fat bum. Oh Lord, please deliver me from all evil.
So many things have changed, so much time has passed. They all changed and passed so fast it feels like they are not worth anything anymore, makes you want to care less because you cannot catch up with everything.
To each of my friends from Kuantan, I love you, and will never forget you. I'll hold on tight to you all, so hold on to me too yea? I hope I didn't make anyone angry, sad or hateful towards me. I probably FFK-ed a lot, and my forgetfulness might make people think i don't care, but in fact I do. It's just I couldn't remember well. Well, explanation doesn't really repair damages done. You all have been with me long enough to know how much i love you all right?? Ahh! You all are the only reason i'm feeling so horrible right now.
Vi Hang's organizing this gathering on the 5th with everyone. Don't really know why, but i feel like i don't want to see you all in the last few days. I don't want our last memories to be tearful. I don't want to see sad faces. I hate goodbyes. But i'm still going, haha.. you're all too precious to miss out on. 10-20 years from now, who knows what can happen? I think we would all grow far apart from each other. We'll all find our soul mates, perhaps meet again once in 10 years. Right now, I know I will not let that happen. Hell no. If that happens, i'll feel like those years we spent together would be wasted. It'll be so meaningless.
Kenneth, if you're reading this - just want you to let you know that you've been a really good friend to me, and sometimes I take advantage of you. I know you'll probably say:"Where got??" but I know got because I did it. Haha, maybe you're thinking now "aihz, you think too much le." Okay! it's my blog, just let me write what i want to say okay?! Among all of my friends I think I worry for you most. You're too nice! And there's lots of bad people out there, agh. Take care of yourself man. I'm sure you'll do okay though. I wish you and Shi Wei blessings and may your love last, so long as the sun still rises. Shi Wei and Kenneth, you guys make a cute couple. Despite of all that hardships, you guys really made it through. People say things about you all because they don't know you yet. Be strong!
Russell, if you're reading this - just want to let you know that I appreciate those times you were with me. You were with me during the most boring times. For 1 year at least, you sat beside me in school right? We sneaked food into our mouths while teacher is facing the other way. Basically, we sleep when tired/bored. eat when hungry. Those times, really - i felt like I have another cool brother. Ah, I know you're working hard to lose weight (for her xD). Don't overdo it though. Also... ahh nevermind. Whatever I say, you still will drive like a mad man. Colloquially speaking :"nid langgar le only know wrong." All the best with your love too yeah! Oh yeah, I remember your challenge. Race up Bukit Pelindung when I get back for CNY! I'm telling you, time flies. Don't procrastinate yea?
Vi Hang, William. Aih. I think you both won't come to read my blog de la. Vi Hang, if accidentally saw your name, maybe you'll continue reading xD. Though we don't meet much, and don't do much together. I think we all know in our hearts what kind of relationship we have. You guys are some of the most steady-est guys lah! Haha. Both recently fell out of a relationship. Sorry but perhaps a better one will come by in the future, you know that also lah, no need me to tell. Actually, I don't have to say much. You guys don't worry me at all. I know you are steady. All the best lah!
Kenny - you're steady too. Though you're the most likely to read this post, i still don't have anything to write to you. haha. Stay steady.
Yan - Lol, you really ah. You're the closest to me. So close we can already read each other's minds. Whatever you do, i'm sure you will do it with all your heart and soul. So, i bet you'll be really successful in the future. You might end up in a whole new place, far from here. Successful, surrounded with new friends, have a wonderful family with overachieving kids. I'm not sure where I can still fit in.. God bless you bro. Stay steady.
Okay this post will end soon. Too much time on blogging gets me bored quickly. I plan to go find Teh, let him knock me around a bit in KL.
Recap of the week.
Monday (Today) : Packing! Go school.
Tuesday : Pack all stuff and go to school. It'll be my last day.
Wednesday : Morning Pelindung with BS, then maybe take bus to KL.
Thursday : In KL. Playing all day. Maybe do a bit of shopping?
Friday : Hope to be back in Kuantan now. Rest a bit. Yumcha with Elaine Pooh and family. <3
Saturday : GN Night. Hah, hope i have something nice to wear..
Sunday : 1030hrs - fly to KL. Arriving Xi'An approx. 2230hrs.
Monday next week will be the start of a whole new life for me.
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